Sunday, November 09, 2008

Not exactly an entry

The problem is the general idea of a storyline. I have good bits that could go in the middle, but without the hook at the beginning it means nothing. Or I have a beginning and and end but disjointed bits in the middle with no connective tissue. And I don't think that they're long enough bits to keep people entertained, they're long enough for a chuckle but not a full on belly laugh that I'm after. Or am I after it? Should it be serious like the bit where the zombie sister is after the zombie brother for turning her in to a plaything for the lich. Oooo thats good motivation, shes mad at the killing and trying to keep up her "I want to purge the world of undead with a big smashy hammer" maxim. Makes me want to listen to street fighting man. But the characters don't act like they should, they act like friends of mine would. And is the child thing something that should be brought it? I do like the idea of a one eyed one armed elf yelling at a zombie to get his bastard progreny back from another group of elves with diffrent colored skin only to be rewarded by a shot in the face of evil energy by said rugrat, noticeably creeping out my slack skined protagonist because it means that the darkness was always in him even before he started getting a hankering for brains. Which fits in the back story, but I think the only way would be for the whole thing to be made as an episodic cartoon show. I wonder if folks actually like the giant middle finger as an ending. where the secondary hero blows up or something taking out the badguy, doing one of those kicks ass butch cassidy fuck this shit knock over the janga blocks kind of deal.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Engrish crass

The problem with my life is I have a lot of arguments. Most of them were so meaningless that I’ve over written them with more important things, like the lyrics to American Pie, or obscure videogame trivia. The big ones, the life defining ones that take place between me and family and girlfriends, aren’t amusing enough for me to recount. My maxim is that if the story isn’t good enough to tell in your friends in a bar, then it’s not really important enough to write down. I’m sure physicists and noble laureates would argue with me, but if they did id have to write this paper about that.
The last argument I had, or at least the one I can remember that wasn’t something involving a massively multiplayer online game happened only a few days ago. I decided to leave out the game arguments because most of them degenerate into the person that I’m arguing with me and I slinging insults like “D00d, j00 r n00b” and “No, YOUR mom.”; arguments like that are the kind that differentiate the gamer sub class from mainstream humanity. The last argument I had was in my American Government class. The teacher was trying to make a point about how American was better the most places in the world. I don’t think I’ll ever know why he brought up Roe v. Wade, but I’m glad he did, because it was becoming a thoroughly boring class, and I would have more then likely lost interest in the class all together if he hadn’t. The point he was trying to make was that in American, laws fit the will of the people and can be changed if need be. Unfortunately, this girl had a bee in her bonnet about abortion, how women are discriminated against in all countries and how that Row v. Wade made it possible for women to take control of their bodies. She continued her impassioned speech about how women everywhere should throw off the yoke of the phallocracy when I started just tuning her out. I tend to do that when it come to misinformed zealots. At heart, I really don’t care about Roe v. Wade, I’m a guy who sticks with the Kevin Smith school of thought: “A woman’s body is her own f&#@ing business”, but when she started talking about how courageous Jane Roe is and how she’s still fighting for women’s rights today, I got a little annoyed. Everything she was saying was fake, a figment of some twisted souls imagination who had indoctrinated this ideology into this haplessly ignorant person. I could have been nice about the situation, let it go on or spoken privately to the woman outside of class, but she had screwed up my one chance for a nap that day, so I was itching to carve out my pound of flesh from her ignorant hide.
I decided to send a warning shot across her bow first, there was no need to shoot her in the back, it would spoil the fun of seeing the look on her face
“Do you even know what you’re talking about?”
About two thirds of the eyes in the class turn toward me, the others keep their bored look of detached resignation that most people get in History classes. Her eyes are boring into me. I can almost read her thoughts, each one an angry exclamation inside of her head trying to burst out and cut me down for the Y in my chromosome manifest.
“Of course I do,” she sends back at me, working in all the venom she can muster.
“Then you know Jane Roe isn’t her real name.”
I can see that my first volley has stunned and confused her. At this point I have two options. A) I can draw this out for about an hour, give her enough rope to make herself a noose and near the end of the class and pull on it till the line stops jerking, or B) I explain everything to her, and we can get the class moving again.
“Listen,” I say, knowing that if I don’t have some sort of explanation that every woman in there was going to beat me like a piñata at a five year olds birthday party, “I personally don’t care about abortion, being a guy it really doesn’t concern me as much as it does women, but there is no woman named Jane Roe. That name is equivalent of Jane Doe for court cases. The real girls name Norma McCorvey. She pulled a Kerry a few years back and is on the pro-lifers side now after she got born again.”
I could tell that id burned her with that remark, but I hoped that by being burned once she would think about her actions and not be burned again. I also knew I was rationalizing so I wouldn’t feel so bad about being mean to a person who obviously didn’t know any better, but at that point I decided that I was thinking to much and decided to take a well deserved nap.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

New Weapons of War 1861-1865

* this is a paper I just turned in for History. Enjoy.*

The Civil War was one of the bloodiest periods of American History. Of course what do you expect when the only people getting killed are other Americans? Like all times of conflict, the period between the siege of Fort Sumter on April 12, 1861(Fort Sumter) and the signing of the surrender at Appomattox court house on April 9, 1865 (Surrender at Appomattox, 1865)was a great time of innovation for the engines of death. Fearsome beast made from steel and lead stalked the land, the air, and the water, ending the lives of men who had once been country men and in some cases, brothers. But, what were these monsters? Where did they come from? And why were they made? These were questions I asked myself for a long time, and decided that, using market formulas, that if I had questions, that a hundred thousand other people must have the same questions I do. So I decided to read up on the subject and share my findings with others, and to finally answer the question of what were the new weapons that were being used during the American Civil War.

The Air

Just like during all battles since the inception of war, information was a commodity more precious the gold during the American Civil War. The old G.I. Joe slogan of “knowing is half the battle” is more accurate then those old Saturday cartoons made it out to be. Prior to the American Civil War, scouts or men in trees were the only way to get battle field information. These men were easy shots for sharp shooters and even if they survived, their information may have been too late to be useful. But, in January of 1862, a civilian balloonist name Thaddeus Lowe was given permission by the union army to operate some of their balloons. Using a telegraph wire attached to the balloon, he reported on enemy troop movements to officers on the ground that in turn used the information to direct artillery. Though Successful, the military use of balloons floundered causing the Union army to disband the Union balloon corps in 1863, before the beginning of the Gettysburg campaign. Confederates had a similar idea for a military use for balloons, but (forgive the pun) the idea didn’t quite make it off the ground. (Innovation in Military Battle.)

The Water

By the 1860’s Americans were still using wooden ships to transport cargo, people, and to wage war with. That was until the Confederates seized the Norfolk Navy Yard on 20 April 1861. While they were poking around, they found a lot of valuable salvage, among which was the scuttled remains of a steam frigate, the USS Merrimack. Though she was burned and sunk, most of the machinery was still operable. After two months in dry dock, the USS Merrimack was resurrected as the CSS Virginia. Far from her original wooden construction, she was given a new type of iron shell. “She carried ten guns of her own, a seven-inch pivot-mounted rifle at each end and a broadside battery of two six-inch rifles and six nine-inch smoothbores.” (CSS Virginia (1862-1862), ex-USS Merrimack). Not only was she freakishly armored and bristling with weaponry, The CSS Virginia had another deadly surprised for waiting union ships, an iron battering ram, turning the ship itself into a weapon of total destruction. The Union army, aghast after the CSS Virginia sunk the USS Cumberland, and slapped the USS Congress into submission sent out their own “iron clad” The USS Monitor. Though similarly armored, The USS Monitor had the distinction of having both a revolving turret carrying two cannons and the nickname “cheese-box on a raft”. On March 9th of 1862, the two ships met at Hampton Roads, and fought each other for three hours, ultimately ending in a draw. The two metal hide beasts kept each other in check till the CSS Virginia was destroyed when the Confederates abandoned the Norfolk Navy Yard and the USS Monitor sank in stormy seas a few months later (Innovation in Military Battle.)

Submarines first showed up during the American Civil War as well. The first successful submarine, The CSS Hunley, though poorly built, was a marvel of engineering. Using its only weapon, a torpedo on a stick called a "Lee Spar Torpedo"; the CSS Hunley destroyed the USS Housatonic. Though successful with its mission, the CSS Hunley was also destroyed, along with the entire crew. (CSS H.L. Hunley, 2000)

Small Arms

At the beginning of the American Civil War, flintlock muskets were the standard weapon for the infantry of both the Union and Confederate armies. These were mostly foreign made army issues copies of the British “Brown Bess” or the French “Charleville”. If you’ve never seen a flintlock musket, imagine a tube of metal with a hole on one end and another smaller hole on the other. By pouring gunpowder down both of these holes and using a small piece of flint to ignite the gunpowder on the smaller end, the musket was able to propel a small metal ball great distance until it’s stopped by the gravity, a tree, or on occasion another human body. They took about a minute to load and fire, but being that muskets were smoothbore weapons; they were horribly inaccurate, if they fired at all. During the American Civil War, a new type of gun and ammunition were introduced. The practice of “rifling” or cutting spiraling grooves down the bore of a musket to increase its accuracy had been in place since colonial times, but due to the considerable amount of time it took for rifled musket to be loaded, they were almost wholly a civilian weapon until 1849. In 1849, a French army officer created a conical shaped bullet that took advantage of spinning effect that a rifle’s grooves had on the ammunition as it was fired. This greatly extended the range of rifles, as well as making them extremely accurate. A further advance was the practice of combining both the projectile and the propellant into one piece. The new cartridge type ammunition made the average infantry men able to fire multiple rounds before reloading and able to reload in a position other then shoulder to shoulder with their comrades. (Military Technology)

The famous Gatling Gun was also introduced during the Civil War, though there are no recorded uses of it in action. Created by Richard Jordan Gatling and patented on November 4th, 1862. The Gatling gun had from between six to ten barrels on a round frame connected to a base and a crank. By loading in a magazine of cartridge style bullets, an average rate of 300 shots per minute could be attained by a trained gunnery team. (Gatling Gun)

Artillery

During the beginning of the American Civil War, The United States of America was one of the world’s leaders in the production of artillery weapons. Artillery pieces were sorted into three separate groups based on their uses: Guns, howitzers, and mortars.

Guns did what they do today, fire projectiles great range with little too no firing arc, which is basically saying they shoot what they’re looking at. These were the cannons that were seen on the high seas or as coastal defense groups, where one shot could make all the difference and accuracy is key. The major change that Gun type artillery went through during the American Civil War was the addition of conical projectiles and rifling that small arms also received.

Mortars during the American Civil War were huge monstrosities that weighted tons. They are high trajectory weapons, which severely limits their range but allows mortars to be fired over walls and into the middle of groups of men. During the American Civil War, mortars were added to costal defense groups as close proximity weapons as well as being placed on ships, giving the mortar deadly maneuverability.

Howitzer is a catchall term applied to artillery pieces that were neither gun nor mortar. Howitzers were mostly antipersonnel weapons that relied on line of fire aiming.

Artillery ammunition also advanced. Explosive shells were used to a great degree, as well as new antipersonnel rounds that worked the same way as claymore mines work today.

The years of 1861 to 1865 were the bloodiest in American history because of the advancements made in weapon technology. Men were slaughtered at a rate that staggered the mind because of Gatling Guns, ship captains became wary of the very water that they traveled in, wondering if it shrouded unseen enemies in submarines, and the very skies were turned against your opponents when they could be seen from balloon. Because of the innovation that weapons received during this time, the number of men killed during war rose steadily higher.


Work Cited

"Fort Sumter." Fort Sumter National Monument (National Park Service). National Park Service. 30 Nov. 2005 .

"Surrender at Appomattox, 1865." Surrender at Appomattox, 1865. 1997. EyeWitness to History. 30 Nov. 2005 .

“Innovation in Military Battle.” American Journey Online: The Civil War. Primary Source microfilm, 1999. Reproduced in the History Resource Center, Farmington Hills, MI: Gale Group. Http://galenet.galegroup/servlet/HistRC/

"CSS Virginia (1862-1862), ex-USS Merrimack." Confederate Ships--CSS Virginia (1862-1862). 19 2001. DEPARTMENT OF THE NAVY -- NAVAL HISTORICAL CENTER. 30 Nov. 2005 .

"CSS H.L. Hunley." CSS H.L. Hunley. 2000. DEPARTMENT OF THE NAVY -- NAVAL HISTORICAL CENTER. 30 Nov. 2005 .

“Military Technology.” Encylopedia of the United States in the Nineteenth Century. 3 vol. Charles Scribner’s Son’s, 2001. Reproduced in History Resource Center. Farmington Hills, MI: Gale Group. Http://galenet.galegroup.com/servlet/HistRC/

“Gatling Gun.” Dictionary of American History. 7 vol. Charles Scribner’s Son’s, 2001. Reproduced in History Resource Center. Farmington Hills, MI: Gale Group. Http://galenet.galegroup.com/servlet/HistRC/

Friday, November 25, 2005

Martini is with gin, not vodka. Do I look like 007 to you?!

heres something thats been on my mind for a long while now: I wasnt where i wanted to be in life. Now, im rather drunk, and my sleep cycle's missing a few of those funny little arrows that show progression, which at least explains the spelling and grammer errors, but i found a great and effective way to derail that train of thought and send it smashing into the orphenage of self doubt and loneliness. Basic principle: Fuck'um. That's it. Fuck'um. So what am I talking about? Am I saying that you should go out and get every woman who blew you off for prom to sleep with you? NO! well, yes, that would be a good thing, but no in this case. Those people you thought were so great in highschool, aint doing shit. Believe me, ive seen them, most are in my History class. For the longest time, there was a person i thought was the greatest person in the world, and i worshiped the ground they walked on. I amplified the flaws in myself and ingnored the flaws in that person. Guess what I found out today? Im a pretty man. I sounds retarded, but shit, if you've never talked with someone you thought was hot for an hour over coffee in a Borders, got up to leave, then have the sudden relization that, " Holy Shit, she was flirting with me" then i suggest you do it right now. Fuck all them bitches that put you down and made you feel shitty. Their lives, ive seen the future for them. Loveless marrige, divorce, 2 kids who are so bitchy that they are excatly like copies of themselves at that age, a six pack a day habit( and not even good beer, the 2.99 shit), its all comming, and its gonna hit them like...well a train hitting an orpehnage. Heed my words as well. Im always right, just ask anyone who thought John W was straight.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Internal Thoughts: one voice is many

So, I've called this meeting because we need to descuss what were going to do about the current situation.

We could always stay, I like her, she makes us feel warm...

Damn you're gay


SHUT UP!


This is counter productive. The current situation is detramental to all parties involved. She doesnt need the prime to be latched on to her, and the prime's worsening emotial problems are beginning to take a physical toll.

Thats mostly because the primes inablility to aquire REM sleep, which is the primes fault more then it is hers. We should deal with those problems before this one.

We've been at this for 3 years now, i say drop it, the whole thing. We could start fresh afterwards.

But what would that mean for her? Have we thought about that?

What does it matter what she feels, shes been putting us through this for this long, i say if she feels as she does, then she gets no mercy for this.

*Sigh* This is getting us no where. I think were done. Who's up for tacos?

Me



that would be an acceptible decision



oh, oh, can we get those cinnimon twist things?




I've got nothing better to do






Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Half assed post

Judd Nelson, the guy from Breakfast Club, was Actually Hot Rod in the Transfomers movie...freaky.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Currently taking apps for girlfriends: Must be between 21 & 24, hot, and not crazy

Seriously.