Really Crappy College Work!!!

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The carpet of the room is a faded peach. The walls are the color of white paper that’s been left out in the sun too long. The ceiling is the same as the walls, save for the fan set smack in the middle of it. Long ropey beards of dust drip for the fans blades, almost touching the sole piece of furniture in the room. The lonely bed looks like its been there for years, the center sags notably, and a few of the box springs poke from the sides. The floor, the walls, and the bed are barren.

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The ancient arthritic man scoots an inch forward. The clerk, who was lobotomized by quack doctor with shaky hands, drags the old man’s hundred pound bags of flour and corn meal across the electric eye with his broken arms. The living fossil pulls what must be a leather bound novel from his pocket and proceeds to read every page until he pulls a credit card from its folds. It scrapes across the giant card reader. Methuselah rereads the collected works of Shakespeare, Poe, and Six different versions of the bible in his mind before he remembers his four hundred and thirty seven number pin. I really just want to go home. I hate H.E.B.

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My high school geometry teacher was a whale. We feared her falling down because we would either be crushed by her or killed it the earthquake that fallowed. Her rolls of fat were hypnotic because her body was affected by the moon the way waves are. Smaller students are unavoidably attracted to her, not out of any attraction, simply because her mass is great that she draws them into orbit around her. I was once told her clothing was made from old ship sails, and that she could swallow cows. I’m not being insulting, I just tell the truth.